CONFESSIONS OF A DREAMER II

I have always been asked on job interviews of ,"how do I see myself 10 years from now?". I have always responded the same thing. Back then I always say, I see myself with a stable job, maybe a family of my own, and/or performing in Broadway and living in New York. I know the latter is so ambitious of me, but I didn't care then.

10 years after, I may not have a family of my own yet, yes I am so grateful for the work I have now, I may not be living in New York yet (and still remains as a far-fetched dream), and obviously I have not been able to go back and perform on stage for years. 

But, I am happy. 

As yesterday marked my 10th year anniversary in a corporate setup, it made me think of the things I've done. The things/companies I let go of in order to move forward. It made me remember all the incredible people I met who became part of my struggles and achievements. It made me think of the opportunities I didn't take, just so I could do what I want and be in a job where I think would bring out more of the best in me. I had no regrets.

Now, I may not be the one performing and being cheered onstage, but I have been given opportunities to see and capture great performances/shows/actors/scenes. I may not be on the front-line of straight plays or musicals, but I developed a deep drive in supporting start-up independent groups/artists, even the well established ones. I have been surrounded by people who love and cherish the same things I do. I have been meeting good, creative, and beautiful souls in my arts journey. Maybe it's because of these never-ending love for the craft and the people in it -- in this country, that I think were reasons why I've always placed my application abroad on-hold. I'm not even sure anymore if I'll fit in other countries in the first place.

As one of the quotes I live by states: "Sometimes, you may not end up where you want to be, but you will ALWAYS end up where God wants you to be." 

I truly believe this is where HE wanted me to be. This is what HE wanted me to do. And for these 10 years and more years to come (hopefully), I know HE will always be there to back me up. :-)

OLD POEM COLLECTION I

A Perfect Ending

At the close of our day,

I linger in your eyes,

Lost in the moment,

Cherishing your touch.

Kissing, your tongue with mine,

Teasing me, exciting me, making me ache,

Wanting you to take me right then.

I lay back, pleading without words,

Breathless with anticipation,

As you stand over me, taunting,

Making me wait, admiring what you've done.

Anxious, I raise my hips to greet your stare,

Beckoning you to enter me,

As if the lips hidden there

Could speak for me, to some other part of you.

Finally, you grant me relief,

Embedding my being,

My feet upon your chest to brace us both,

As you thrust deep inside, again and again.

You reach places within me,

I thought were untouchable,

The pain hurting so good,

That I can’t help but cry out.

You wonder, if possibly you are hurting me,

Easing momentarily, but then I say, “don’t stop”,

And you know my whimpers are from ecstasy,

As I call you back into our entrancing dance.

My eyes are open to catch you,

As you’re stealing satisfaction with your own,

Taking pride in knowing it is you,

That has caused these looks to come across my face,

Demonstrating to you, your power over me.

And then you say, “Oh Lady”,

As you gaze at me dreamily,

Shaking your head, as in disbelief,

Shyly grinning, revealing to me my own power

To make you feel alive.

I know you are close to leaving me,

Traveling to that place I can not follow,

And I ask you not to go,

Trying with all my might to make you stay,

Requesting, “easy, wait”, as I push you to your back,

Climbing atop you.

Then ever so carefully, I navigate you once again,

To the edge of your own heaven,

As I find that perfect rhythm of my own,

Barely breathing.

And as I start to throb, I become the one

Who can not be stopped from taking flight,

As I ride you wildly, beyond the realms of night,

Into my own promised land.

And returning to earth,

I find to my delight,

You, also coming back to ground,

From a visit to a paradise,

That we both, together, found.